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Strategies to Cope With an Angry Child

Many parents have to deal with the trials and tribulations of angry children, particularly when those children reach adolescence. Angry children can be extremely hard to cope with on top of all other challenges in daily life but, as a parent, there is no running away from your child’s anger problems. There are, however, some strategies a parent can learn to help them better cope with their child’s anger and, at the same time, uncover the reasons for their child’s anger. Remember, when an adolescent is angry there are usually complicated issues behind his or her anger and, with a bit of patience and understanding, parents may be able to reconnect with their children and help alleviate some of the anger issues.

It may seem very difficult to show love an angry, sometimes violent child, but that may be just what the child needs…love and understanding. It can be frustrating to try sit down with your child to work out anger issues as they quite often are more interested in giving you grief in return for the love they are receiving, but don’t let your own frustrations get the best of you.

If you are having difficulty coping with an angry child, here are a few strategies that might help you cope and possibly help alleviate some of your own child’s frustrations and anxieties.

How to Connect With an Angry Child
First of all, use all of the patience you have to sit down and have a heart to heart with the child. Many children may resist this, but it is essential to getting at the source of your child’s anger or resentment. Work to peel off their layers of anger and often you will find that an angry child or teenager is just using a bad attitude to cover up feelings of being vulnerable, anxious, or isolated. If you can build a friendly relationship with your child they will begin to trust you more. As you gain their trust it will be much easier to reach them and help with whatever problems they may be facing in life.

The next thing you can do to help you deal with your angry child is to listen rather than reprimand. Many children will shut down and turn cold against an authority figure who is telling them what to do, how to act, or, worse yet, to lighten up. Rather than telling your child what to do, ask them questions about their life and interests. If they know they can open up to you about their thoughts without getting reprimanded or bossed around, they will be more likely to open up and share information about the sources of their anger.

Also, an important strategy for better coping with angry children is to avoid showing anger around your child. Children learn from example and if you deal with situations by getting angry you are setting the wrong example for your children. Learn to become a steady presence in their lives by effectively dealing with and managing your own frustrations. Your child will not take your anger management advice seriously if they see you using angry outbursts to deal with your problems.

Finally, talk with other parents, school staff, and counselors who have dealt with similar situations with other children. Perhaps they have learned from experience and can give you a few more tips for managing your child’s anger. If anything, you will know that you are not alone and this can sometimes be the best way to help you cope. Knowing others are out there to help you can give you the strength you need to effectively talk to your child and help him or her through their angry reactions.


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